‘Hey Chris Bosh’ Twitter Account Is a Comedy Slam Dunk

It's not a new account and its offbeat humor may not appeal to all, but the @Hey_ChrisBosh Twitter profile will definitely have some basketball fans doubled up in giggles. If only people had a way of discovering it.

"Sted Mankowski" (not the tweeter's actual, real-life name) has a simple mission: to get Chris Bosh to reply to one of his tweets. So far -- and Sted's tried more than 1,700 times over the past two years -- it hasn't worked. But no matter. The quest presses on.

@Hey_ChrisBosh's questions to and mentions of Bosh are comical in their everyday mundaneness and casual bro'd out tone. Take a few recent examples:

Hey @chrisbosh, wait, are crossbows covered under the 2nd Amendment or no? #NBA

— Sted Mankowski (@Hey_ChrisBosh) December 11, 2012

Hey @chrisbosh, I don't believe in ghosts per se. #NBA

— Sted Mankowski (@Hey_ChrisBosh) December 10, 2012

Hey @chrisbosh, wanna day drink? #NBA

— Sted Mankowski (@Hey_ChrisBosh) December 8, 2012

They all repeat that same format, each one beginning "Hey @ChrisBosh," over and over and over again. That devotion to never breaking character, however, has hindered Sted's ability to promote the account.

But why Bosh? In an email to Mashable, Sted refused to reveal his true identity but offered this elucidation: "I dare you to think of a person who is more random. There's something so random about it. I have had people tell me they can't watch Heat highlights without laughing."

To be fair, Bosh -- bless his heart and considerable basketball skills -- is a pretty random dude. He's gained a special place in NBA fans' hearts by making faces like this while on the bench in street clothes:

And faces like this while playing on the court:

And also for celebrating his Miami Heat's 2012 NBA title with a bottle of champagne like this:

So, here's a champagne toast to you, "Sted Mankowski." Thanks for the laughs.

1. 1. @NotBillWalton

   NBA legend and hardcore Grateful Dead fan, Bill Walton is known for his sometimes curious verbiage and his philosophical take on the game of basketball. This account takes full advantage.

   

2. 2. @TheFakeESPN

   This account serves as a bizarro version of the Worldwide Leader in Sports, and has some 175,000 followers as a testament to its humor.

   

3. 3. @RogerGoodell

   NFL commissioner Roger Goodell is a pretty serious fellow, but what if he told us how he really feels?

   

4. 4. @_Happy_Gilmore

   Wait, that Adam Sandler movie was fiction, right?

   

5. 5. @fakegrantland

   The smart and oh-so-hip website Grantland provides loads of great sports writing, but can sometimes take itself a wee bit seriously. This account pokes fun with fake stories and headlines.

   

6. 6. @CoachQsMustache

   Joel Quenneville, coach of the NHL's Chicago Blackhawks, sports a formidable bristly 'stache. Follow its trials and tribulations here.

   

7. 7. @PeytonsHead

   This account pays homage to quarterback Peyton Manning's nugget, and provides commentary on happenings around the sports world.

   

8. 8. @Fake_Prokhorov

   New Jersey Nets owner and Russian billionaire Mikhail Prokhorov could give that Dos Equis guy a run for his money as the Most Interesting Man in the World. So he's a natural for a fake Twitter account.

   

9. 9. @FauxJohnMadden

   Legendary NFL coach and analyst John Madden -- straight, no chaser and with a twist of the ridiculous.

   

10. 10. @FakeCoachPop

    San Antonio Spurs coach Gregg Popovich is known to be a cool, but fairly reserved dude. He'd probably be great on Twitter, but for now, this fake account will have to do.

    

11. 11. @PretendLouHoltz

    Former Notre Dame football coach Lou Holtz can be pretty tough to understand as a sportscaster, due to his excitable nature and less-than-stellar enunciation. This account hasn't tweeted in couple months, but will hopefully get going again when football season comes around.

    

12. 12. @EmoChrisBosh

    Fair or not, Miami Heat forward Chris Bosh is frequently maligned for timid play and a lack of mental toughness. This account plays off his perceived "emo" nature.

    

13. 13. @RexRyan

    Verbose New York Jets coach Rex Ryan is not (yet) on Twitter. Until he joins, this will have to do.

    

14. 14. @OldHossRadbourn

    Charles "Old Hoss" Radbourn was a baseball pitcher in the 1800s. What if his ghost had a Twitter account?

    

15. 15. @FakeFredWilpon

    New York Mets owner Fred Wilpon is a high-profile figure, in part for being a victim of Bernard Madoff's financial scam. Keep up with him in (fake) real-time here.