El 4: What if Every Tom Hanks Movie Took Place in the Same Universe?

jueves, 10 de octubre de 2013

What if Every Tom Hanks Movie Took Place in the Same Universe?

Tom Hanks sets sail in Captain Phillips on Oct. 11, but exactly how did he end up on a boat about to be hijacked by pirates?

Official Comedy examined Hanks' body of work and wondered if he has just floated through the same movie universe since Forest Gump in 1994?

This supercut begins with Hanks graduating from school, then follows him as he pursues a career in space travel, crashes onto an island with Wilson and unearths secrets of the Catholic church.

And somewhere in between all that, he makes a friend named Buzz and dates Meg Ryan. It seems plausible, but only 'cause it's Tom.

BONUS: 11 Animated Children's Films More Devastating Than Any Disney Movie

1. Fern Gully

If you told every kid this smog monster would come for them if they didn't recycle, the planet would be saved in 10 years.
2. We're Back! A Dinosaur's Story

On one hand, this is a cute little movie that involves lovable, singing dinosaurs and Julia Child's voice.
On the other hand, a small child signs a contact with blood and the villain -- seconds after delivering this rather deep line -- is eaten alive by crows.
3. The Last Unicorn

It's a toss up between what's more terrifying: the flaming Red Bull, or the eagle dealing with multiple nip slips.
4. The Swan Princess

Watching this film gave kids a lot of choices for life-long phobias. Would they be irrationally afraid of bats, wolves or lime green saran wrap?
5. All Dogs Go to Heaven

When children ask for a floor plan of heaven, it's easy for adults to get nervous and tongue tied since they don't know the specifics. If a kid ever asks you what hell is like, however, you can just show them All Dogs Go to Heaven. They really nail it.
6. Balto

Tiny coffins. Tiny, tiny coffins.
7. An American Tail

Besides the fact that the entire movie is basically Home Alone 2: Lost in New York without the comic relief, the Giant Mouse of Minsk is horrifyingly creepy.
8. The Secret of NIMH

You know a movie is going to be weird when this is a good guy.
9. The Iron Giant

The perfect film for budding conspiracy theorists: A large chunk of time is spent showing the army's attempts to destroy the beloved hero.
10. Anastasia

A singing corpse is hell-bent on killing a girl with tiny florescent gremlins. No amount of quips from the funny bat can balance that.
11. The Prince of Egypt

To be fair, not much could be done to make this movie more kid-friendly given the source material. Still, sickles and babies do not make for a pleasant visual.